Living Originally: Compassionate Communication

Patience has never been something I have been good at. I am a “let us get it done” kind of girl. However, with age comes wisdom (and on Thursday I will be 76 years young) and I will give myself a pat on the back that I have learned something about patience. Ministry has been a great teacher. Where I am leading with all this is that on Saturday there were four overly ambitious women who came together and worked at preparing the raised gardens for vegetables.

Anna Ritchie has been attending to these gardens for a few years along with Ginger Dowling; however, there was never a consistent group who would give of their time and love for this to really happen. Now Anna and Ginger have the support of Betti Lou Lewis, Janice Murphy, and Julia Orr. So, friends, look for fresh veggies this summer. This group is open to more help, so if you want to work with some awesome women, here is a good opportunity.

As we continued exploring the book Living Originally by Rev. Robert Brumet, the topic this past Sunday was Practice No. 5: Compassionate Communication.

Rev. Robert Brumet

Rev. Robert Brumet

When we practice compassionate communication, we have a great impact and greater connection and understanding within our relationships whether or not the other individual or individuals know about the practice of compassionate communication.

There are two components of compassionate communication. The first is “right speech” from the Buddhist teachings of the Noble Enlightenment Path. The guidelines for “right speech”: before I speak or write I consider: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Right Speech rests upon intention: Am I seeking self-transformation or am I trying to change someone else?

The second component is compassionate listening. Brumet outlines four levels of listening…

  • Lowest level…when I hear the words but am preoccupied with my own thoughts and judgments…
  • Next level…more open to what the speaker has to say…
  • The third level of listening is when I am honestly willing to be changed because of my interaction with the other person.
  • The fourth level of listening takes us beyond what we have thought of as listening to where the speaker and listener go into a field of listening to Spirit as it speaks to both. The fourth level is what the Buddhist call “beginners mind.” The mind that opens to each experience as if for the very first time, with no prejudices and no agenda.

I have just given you the Cliff note version of the message, which you can watch in the above video.

Robert Brumet’s meditation for this lesson is here

You are a blessing in my life,
Rev. Patricia Bessey

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