Sunday Message by Rev. Pat Bessey —
Summer is close at hand! In just a couple of days we turn the calendar to June. When we move into June it’s a sign that school will soon be over for the summer. That isn’t the case here: Our teachers and children meet every Sunday year-round. In the summer the curriculum is more relaxed, and it is also an opportunity for you to bring a special fun activity to the children’s program. The teachers and children welcome you with great enthusiasm and all that is required of you is to give them a date you will be there and to bring the activity. Everyone that spends time with these bright lights feel blessed and fulfilled from the experience.
Are you wondering how well we did with the Eat, Play, Love auction? Let’s hear a drumroll… the dollar net amount is $5,119.23. Well done to all who participated and contributed to make this a success.
This past Sunday was the fifth talk of six using the book I of the Storm, written by Unity minister Gary Simmons. It was focused on these three little words, “Tell Me More.” The teachings from this phrase has been far reaching for me.
I want to explore a principle and a skill we can use to dismantle the separation that is occurring when we feel defensive or resistant. This occurs when we are being judged, when we are being criticized. Do you remember what Jesus said about judgment? He said, “Judge not, lest you be judged.”
Whenever we have a judgmental feeling or a critical feeling about someone, what does that signify to us, what does it show us? It points out for us something that we don’t like in ourselves, something that we’ve not been able to look at directly in ourselves. Any time we judge someone else, we are judging our own self.
What does it mean when someone criticizes or judges you? What it means is that it is not about you – it’s about them. When you react to the criticism or judgment, or when you are resistant or defensive, you choose to make it about you.
When someone judges or criticizes you, if you can remember not to be resistant or to become defensive, you have an opportunity to see how this might be for you as opposed to against you. It may be about what is missing in a relationship, it may be about what the other person needs or wants, or it may be about something you said or did. And the magic way to embrace a criticism or judgment is to say three magic words – “Tell me more.” If you say, “Tell me more,” you are staying connected to the other person, you allow that other person to tell you what this is really about, and you let the underlying need be revealed.
This coming Sunday at the 10 a.m. service we will be hosting Jon Mundy.
At the 8 a.m. service, the talk title is “Living in the I of the Storm.”
You are a blessing in my life.
Rev. Patricia Bessey